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Alone with the Sound the Mind Makes

by koleżanka

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1.
Koszmary 03:30
its 1995, before the roads were paved the dust storms in July testing our tiny legs laughing at the danger then watch our bodies disappear turning me around swallow me hit the ground i live on an island now oceans and rivers new things to swallow me whole new hands on my shoulders turning me around
2.
Mania 02:15
mania owns me i’m indebted keeps me sharp when i’m unsteady mania owns me, baby! a curious lover no chance of sleep when i am with her every morning shakes me wide awake she’s persistent, never late every time she calls my name my chest will trill my breath comes late mania owns me, baby! a curious lover while my mind races she’s moving faster
3.
Slapstick 03:24
is there a right way to smile at all these saccharine platitudes? feeling a lot like a slapstick bit where everyone is waiting to see you fall see you fall down I can’t help but be honest to a “hello, how are you?” getting tired of my late night tricks disassociate into a drink or two it is hard to be kind to yourself in a world that isn’t kind to you feels a lot like a bright stage hot lights the audience is begging to see you see you fall down see you fall
4.
time moves quickly (szybko) quick to turn a head (moja głowa) watch the mouths move (nie chcę) what was that you said (co powiedziałeś) went to the party dressed in city summer sweat eyes are for looking i’m made to exist (istnieć) (oh it’s a cry for help) a sign a number a shape we learn it expression its shape a language don’t want it sky spinning silk city lights all recede awaiting a rapture to swallow me
5.
Cheers! 03:48
it’s fight or flight every night in a dream i’m frozen i try to run every night on repeat, i couldn’t i couldn’t i have a habit of hurtling forward, forward assured collision every day another fire i want to rest cheers to all the good times cheers to all the good never a strong swimmer, all flailing arms and sinking legs still, water’s getting higher so its sink or swim as they say as they say it’s fight or flight or fawn or freeze cheers to all the good times cheers to all the good
6.
Eye Contact 01:44
wipe your face you have been eating right from their hand counting backwards from ten force your lungs to expand its hard to be alive looking forward even when the future is at hand
7.
found the photos from the summer you had really shaped me sixteen getting high driving in my buick century after all this time you still feel safe to me hot day in July sun in our eyes but you and i were free touring canals around our city most famed for the debauchery of its youth you got the call that he was gone murder in the first degree disappeared for days without a phone, without a warning cruel are all the ways this world will give you life, unraveling hot as hell July sun in our eyes there’s no escaping that was the last year that you spoke to me
8.
A Body 04:24
what you could say when i’m in the spin knowing a body is a place we live in can’t feel the ground come on! learning a body is a life-long lesson i want to learn yours, too is it true there’s a larger truth to suffering? i fixate a pair of shaking hands hearing a body and translate it’s language hands all around hold on where does the mind go when a body’s finished
9.
Goliath 03:30
pleasantries at a function “so… what’s your calling, what’s your passion?” reset reset searching for an exit its gotta be somewhere i’m no good at putting on a face anymore maybe a body’s just a house made to live in all alone fall into the pit of my stomach fall into the pit of my Goliath reset reset it’s coming back now and it’s a hot one hand on my chest just to make sure I’m still a live one go its ok that you wanted to fall back into that thing you do go it’s ok that you want to go to a place you can be alone
10.
path of most resistance most within the least i dreamt there was something to see and everyone could see but me wander to the window a patch of sun to see softening the first snow softening in me each breath comes as a sigh these days and i’m too soft to hold my shape saddle up, cowboy time’s wasting supply demand dismay so what?
11.
i dream of the home i grew up in a season-less desert framed in mountains and everyone i’ve ever known, could ever know, have ever been stood inside the horseshoe drive stared past the stars intent to listen from the parched earth, water surfaced slow at first then forms a current river rushing up to our knees and the crowd cheers “we have never witnessed a flood like this before!” a flood like this before morning came the river raced no trace of us obliterate

credits

released February 17, 2023

koleżanka is
Kristina Moore: vocals, guitars, bass, drum machine, synths, glass clanks, piano
Ark Calkins: bass, drums, vibraphone, hand claps and aux percussion

clarinet written and performed by Elana Riordan, additional vocals on “Saddle Up, Cowboy” performed by Ark Calkins, Danny Clifton, Abigail Clark, and Steven Head tour guide, spiritual advisement, Sherman Filterbank operator on “Goliath”, ebow guitar on “River Rushing”, and unfailing kindness and attentiveness to The Process by Steven Head

all songs written by Kristina Moore/koleżanka music (ASCAP)

produced by Kristina Moore and Ark Calkins

recorded at Pulp Arts in Gainesville, FL. Engineered by Danny Clifton and Lily Ruckstuhl
clarinet recorded by Hunter Jayne in Brooklyn, NY

mixed and mastered by Jonathan Schenke at Studio Windows in Brooklyn, NY

Album photos by Mateo Ruiz Gonzalez. Photo assistance by Meghan Marin. Art direction by Jesus Charris. Set assistance by Mariano Garay. Album design by Julie Chencinski.

Special thanks to our friends and family for their ears and endless love and support.

Elana Riordan, appears courtesy of Carpark Records

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koleżanka Brooklyn, New York

koleżanka is Kristina Moore

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